Falling For You
by Aiss-Yami
Summary: Jake likes his friend, but with so much going on in thier lives can it work out? PG-13, might be R later on.
1. Of Hawk and Boy

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the animorphs characters ect. This story includes a m/m relationship so, if you don't like that, or it makes you uncomfortable, turn back now. My first J/T fic. Reviews appreciated. Enjoy!  
  
Hey Jake the brown haired boy jumped off his bed and tripped over a dirt stained shoe falling backwards into a laundry basket. If the large and beautiful golden-feathered hawk could have laughed, he would have. His friend looked rather amusing with a sock and some clothes hanging off of him. "Jeez Tobias! What are you playing at? I almost had a heart attack!" Jake stood up rubbing his back. Sorry the hawks eyes stared fiercely at the human I can leave.  
  
"No!" Tobias ruffled his wings at Jakes sudden tone.  
  
"I mean, no, don't worry about it."  
  
I was hoping we could hang out for a while today. I can morph into my human form of course. Blue eyes sparkled "Sure, that would be great, cool."  
  
Tobias took a minute to morph, the animorphs leader didn't want to watch him morph, it was pretty gross, any-body morphing was sick. When it was over Jake turned to look at him "Uh Jake..."  
  
"Wow! I-I mean hold on." The older boys cheeks turned red as he shuffled through his drawers for some clothes. Although he wouldn't mind at all if his incredibly handsome dark haired, green-eyed friend stayed just the way he was, completely unclothed.  
  
Something the oldest animorphs had kept secret from all of his friends, everyone. He had always loved, not just like a friend or brother, but truly loved the boy. Tobias was the most amazing person/so to speak that Jake had ever met. He may have been small but his heart and will was stronger than anyone else's. It would have killed Jake if he was stuck in a morph, but Tobias seemed to be able to get through anything. The older admired the younger.  
  
"Here." Jake handed his friend a pair of baggy jeans and an all to small black shirt. "This is gonna sound weird but can I borrow some..." the hawk boy stopped "never mind." Jake turned away letting his dark haired friend change in private. "I'm done." Tobias said, lying down on the bed. The older boy gulped. It took all of his control not to just run over there and ravish the boy. Messy hair, green eyes twinkling, his shirt showing some of his stomach, pants too big, falling down on his hips.  
  
Jake sat down embarrassed realizing Tobias had probably seen his blue eyes wander. The two talked about tv, sports, video games and anything else they could think of. To any one else they would have seemed like two normal boys, having fun. No one would know how much anguish they each harbored. No one would notice the small looks they gave each other, meaning the world with out saying anything.  
  
"Does it ever totally suck being a hawk?" Jake asked quietly. "I mean... their kinda ugly." He teased "Why couldn't you be stuck as a golden eagle?" Tobias punched him in the stomach playfully "Hey! Golden eagles suck!" The boys grabbed each other and toppled off the bed, wrestling for mock dominance. Jakes bedroom door opened and they froze.  
  
"Uh hey guys." Tom walked in, eyeing the boys with some hidden feeling. "Sorry to intrude." Jake looked at Tobias; he was lying on top of Jakes, one leg in between the older boys. Jake choked at the closeness 'oh god'. They quickly untangled themselves. "N-no bother" Jake lied. Tom nodded his head as if in thought. "Jake can I talk to you?" Tobias looked quizzical, as did Jake. "Uh, sure Tom, 'bout what?"  
  
"Alone."  
  
"Bu-"  
  
"Please?"  
  
"Uh... sure Tom." Jake left the room leaving Tobias to wonder, did Tom know that they could morph? Had he found out? The hawk stood quietly, hands shaking "Jake please be OK." 


	2. The Unchangeable

DISLAIMER: I do not own. Chapter 2 Falling For You  
  
  
  
Jake walked down the hall in silence. 'what does he want to talk about?' Jake shivered inwardly 'maybe he thought more of our wrestling'. Tom opened his bedroom door and let his "little" brother through. Once they were both inside he shut the door and turn on a dim light. "I need... I need to..." Tom seemed to be struggling for words, breath even. 'Oh my god, its actually Tom! He's-He's not a yeerk.'  
  
The younger boy wanted to cry. His emotions yelled for him to leap forward and hug his brother, but he couldn't. He hated himself for not being able to, but he couldn't risk it. The yeerk would know, and then Cassie, Rachel, Marcus and Tobias would all be in trouble. And being the leader he would not allow himself weakness. The boy cursed himself silently. "Jake ..." Tom moved closer, brushing a finger along his brothers jaw. "I-I..." he stopped again, breath mingling between them. "Yeah Tom? What is it?"  
  
"I just want you to look out for yourself."  
  
"But you'll always be here to protect me right? My big brother." Jake felt a knife go through his gut at the pained look in Tom's eyes. He knew those eyes were saying 'No, no Jake... I'm going to die a slave to this filthy thing in my head, I just had to talk to you one last time.' Tom took Jakes hands in his.  
  
"No,"  
  
"What?"  
  
"I won't always be around Jake."  
  
"Of course you will---"  
  
"No! I-I---" Tom started to cough and twitch. "Jake please, take, take care of yourself!" he gasped. "I will Tom. I promise." Then the taller young man smiled. And then the smile was gone replaced by a fake grin. The yeerk was back. "Yes, well thanks for listening to me Jake. I have to go to the sharing tonight, so I have to get going." 'No! No your not welcome you fucking slug! I hate you! I will kill all your kind, I loathe you with every fiber of my being and if I die I will die fighting you, fighting to save the ones I love. Give my brother back!' He wanted to yell, to scream, but it was pointless.  
  
"Yeah, no problem T-Tom. See ya." It was hard getting that three letter word out...Tom. Because it wasn't Tom, not even close. Jake walked out of the small bedroom and made his way slowly back to his own. Tobias was sitting on the edge of the bed, lips pursed in a tight line, hands clasped tightly, brow furrowed in worry. He looked up startled when his friend walked back in. "Jake!" the younger boy sounded like he was about to burst with relief and he flung himself forward, grabbing Jake around the neck and hugging him tightly. The taller boy hugged back numbly. Putting his arms loosely around Tobias's waist. This would have normally made his day... but his day had just been ruined. The boy started to cry and Tobias backed away "Jake?"  
  
All he could think of doing was burying his head on his young hawk friend's shoulder and he did so. Tobias seemed a bit shocked but sat down with Jake and rubbed the older boy's back softly. Jake explained everything, in great detail, up to how many scars he could see on his brother's face, how much pain reflected in those eyes.  
  
'Why! Why did it have to be Tom!' Jake was thrown into a war of feelings, part of him was happy that Tom was able to say something as his normal self. The other was screaming injustice. "God Tobias! Why? Why!" He sobbed uncontrollably. Not caring about anything else except the feelings in the pit of his stomach, the warmth of his friends body, Tobias's tears that were falling onto his shirt. Not caring, not wanting to care. Tobias just made comforting comments, holding Jake close. Not wanting to give this up, not wanting, but having to.  
  
Jake looked at his watch "T-Tobias." He whispered. The younger boy nodded. The pain in his eyes increased. The dark green making him look more mature, and older than could have been possible. Jake knew the pain. He knew Tobias struggled with the iron will to be wild, to bite into raw flesh. But he also knew how strong that small looking boy was on the inside and Jake gave a weak smile hoping his friend would understand.. that he cared, for him.  
  
Tobias let salty tears drip down his chin as he changed "It will be alright Jake."  
  
It wasn't true, it would never be alright. Nothing would ever be alright and Jake knew it. 


	3. Wounds Of Comfort

Disclaimer: Me and Myself and the ever humble I do not own any of the Animorphs characters etcetera.  
  
First off, my good friend Tigre thought that Tobias was stuck in human morph. Let me assure you all... he was not. At least not in chapter two. If you will notice, I wrote that he changed back and said "It will be alright Jake" before doing so. Just so that's all clear, 'ncase you've been confused.  
  
Thank you to: Myself (the anonymous person who gave me a review, not me. I'm not that conceited.), Volleys, Tigre and Julz.  
  
  
  
  
  
Tobias shook his feathered head before darting down into the moon lit grassy field and plucking up a field mouse with his long curved talons. It squealed and he delighted in its small helpless shrieks.  
  
'yes mouse, scream you pitiful filth! I will tear you open and gut you like a fish and sink my beak into your bloody, warm...'  
  
'Tobias! Get a hold of yourself man!'  
  
He shivered disgustedly, dropping the rodent into a nearby hole.  
  
'God, this'll be the end of me. If only I could be with people again.' He landed on a branch gracefully.  
  
'Although no one appreciates me. No-one wants me around.' The boy in him sighed heavily.  
  
'Jake is nice to me. He let me hold him today.' that made the boy inside smile.  
  
'He let me comfort him. Maybe he does care. Maybe.' a fierce wind pulled at his wings and he hung the beaked head.  
  
'Don't hope for too much Tobias. Hoping gets you no where.' The hawk, the boy, sat in the cold. Eyes blazing and heart pounding. Not one human was in sight and Tobias decided, that was a good thing. He shut his hawk eyes and also decided... he was not going to be human anytime soon. He would be forever a hawk, feating on blood and reveling in those screeches that plagued his nightmares. Yes. This was his life. This is how it would always be. This was how he would always remain. As a hawk.  
  
  
  
Jake sat up in his bed. The dream coming back to him clearly. The rain, the wind, the screams... the blood. He ran down the hall and shoved open the bathroom door barely making it to his destination. And then he lost it. His stomach wracked painfully for a minute before settling down and he sucked in a distasteful breath, flushing the toilet. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and proceeded to the sink.  
  
"Jake?" a male voice came from the doorway and he felt his stomach churn again. "Hey Tom." He ignored the urge to turn around and stare deep into those dark eyes and instead quickly washed the vomit from his hand and brushed his teeth thoroughly. "You OK?" his brother seemed concerned. 'But on the inside it's all fake.' Jake thought bitterly, brushing his teeth vigorously to hide his scowl. "Yeah, yeah I'm fine." He answered dully, still not letting himself turn around.  
  
"You sure?" He tensed feeling the large hand on his shoulder. "I-I'm fine Tom. Really." Jake returned the green and silver toothbrush to its holder and left the toothpaste on the counter, not entirely sure if his insides were done boiling. Then ignoring the replica of Tom's concerned look he walked out and headed straight back to his room. Shutting the door behind him.  
  
It opened again. 'WHAT NOW?' he wanted to scream.  
  
It was Tom.  
  
"Hey. I told you I'm-"  
  
"Fine. I know." Jake could see his brothers eyes roll. "Your not. Are you." The younger boy sighed. "Look, I don't really want to talk about this OK?" Tom nodded genuinely.  
  
'No. He's just pretending. He's not being real. That's not Tom. He's lying'  
  
"Jake. I know your having trouble, and I-I don't know what it is but... If you go to the sharing they can help." His eyes stayed focused and calm but his heart broke into a thousand pieces.  
  
"Sure Tom. I'll think about it." The yeerk nodded. "It's a really cool group, the sharing I mean." He came closer and hugged Jake "I just want what's best for you." The animorphs leader coughed heavily and ran out of the room and back to the small bathroom. He hurriedly locked the door before landing on his knees on the tile. His stomach emptied contents that weren't there and he sobbed breathlessly.  
  
  
  
'Why Why WHY!' he gripped the glass bowl harshly and then blacked out. Only to face his dreams alone. More so than ever before. 


	4. Nightmares and Promises

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the animorphs characters.  
  
Volleys: Ha. Now you've been mentioned TWICE in the same fic... anyways, I really appreciate your review, and I'm glad you like it!!  
  
Lauren: n_n You like it? Good. Yeah, I know it is sad, poor Jake T_T THANK YOU.  
  
Trieze: I will write more. Thank you much for the review!  
  
Ok, this isn't the last chapter. Or it won't be if you guys review. If you think I should continue then RNR!! THANX EVERYBODY! Warning: this chapter is kinda sad at the beginning, kinda freaky and kinda weird so, yeah, be warned.  
  
  
  
  
  
A voice.  
  
Pleading.  
  
Calling.  
  
'Jake.'  
  
There was pain. Pain and anguish in his chest. That voice was sinister. but it seemed calm. 'Jake, there's something about to happen. Something horrible, terrible, something that will wake you in the night screaming and crying for someone to save you. And then you'll think that it was just another nightmare. But you'll be wrong.'  
  
The tone of voice changed, now more menacing, more evil without even being harsh or loud at all.  
  
'Your nightmare will be right before your eyes each day as you walk to school, as you come home, you'll be driven insane by the blood and by the helpless cries of your friends.'  
  
Images now flashed before the tall boy's eyes.  
  
Cassie, dead on the ground, mutilated to a sickening degree.  
  
Rachel screaming for help as the controllers impaled her time and time again.  
  
Marco, his face was gaunt and his youth was gone. No more laughing or smiling. He was one of them now.  
  
'And the hardest part will be... that you wont be able to help them. You will be forced not to rush to their aid.'  
  
"Leave me alone!" Jake shrieked pitifully. He held onto his ears, trying to block out the voice in his head "Go AWAY!"  
  
'Oh yes. I will... just one more thing I want to show you. Something that will leave you ripping and clawing at your eyes, wanting it to all go... away.' The voice laughed.  
  
And the pictures came.  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" Jake's hands flung up to his neck, he was choking, and something had him and wouldn't let go.  
  
  
  
Tobias' head shot up, keen hawk senses picking up that earth-shattering scream of terror. He knew beyond any shadow of doubt... that was Jake. He glided to the ground knowing it would be better to morph away from any people. The field was at least five blocks away from Jakes house and Tobias knew it would take everything he had to run to his friend's house, but he would give it.  
  
His bones repositioned themselves, cracking and groaning at the impact, growing. He winced at the pain and took off sprinting, a boy with feather- patterned skin.  
  
'Jake just hold on. I'm coming.'  
  
  
  
He clawed at his neck, fingernails digging into his skin and raking bloody furrows. "NO! NO! NO!" the images were still fresh in his mind, they went on constant replay. He screamed again. Driven mad by his dreams. Some one started talking to him.  
  
"NO! I DON'T WANT TO LISTEN LEAVE ME ALONE!" He wouldn't listen to that voice that haunting, horrible, teasing... but this was different. More concerned. More... familiar?  
  
"Jake. Jake PLEASE! Wake up!"  
  
His eyes flew open to see a pair of concerned green eyes. "Tobias!" The boy nodded vigorously "Yes. It's me."  
  
"Tobias. OH GOD! YOU HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE THEYRE-" The hawk boy shook his head form side to side and put his hand to the others lips in an attempt to silence him. It worked. "Jake please! I had to convince all your family that you were OK. And Tom is probably snooping around out side the door right now." He whispered hurriedly.  
  
Jake had seemed to calm down a bit. "O-ok. I'm sorry."  
  
"Don't apologize. Just come with me." Tobias led his friend to the window and opened it. They successfully made it to the bottom with little difficulty. Tobias was the smaller and more agile of the two so it was easier for him. The boy held out his hand for Jake and helped him down.  
  
"Careful." Tobias' breath hitched in his throat. He had forgotten to step away from his older friend and Jake had ended up pressed against him. Tobias stared up in awe at those beautiful blue eyes. They were so filled with pain. He mentally kicked himself for never noticing all that hurt, he had been to busy with his own anguish.  
  
Instinctively Tobias wrapped his arms around Jake, trying so hard to show his affection, to show he cared.  
  
Jake thought he would die once that beautiful boy put his arms around his waist, hands pressing into the small of his back. 'He cares.' That thought made him smile. His breathing increased slightly, trying not to scare off his friend by his behavior. That would probably make Tobias think he was sick, and perverted. That he couldn't live with.  
  
Tobias felt the change in Jakes breathing and pressed himself closer. All he wanted was to lose himself in that body, to be one with the boy that was so much like him.  
  
"T-tobias?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Thank you." The younger boy smiled into Jakes shirt and replied in a muffled voice.  
  
"Anything for you Jake. Anything." 


End file.
